X研究所:SLP自述範本 + 點評

[2020.01.14] 發表
學友社學生輔導顧問吳寶城

【明報專訊】對紎LP的學生自述,腦袋立即「load唔到機」?正式下筆前,不妨參考以下範本,從專家評語學習寫好自述。

■英文版

I participated in numerous extra-curricular activities throughout my senior secondary school years and learnt many skills from them.

At Secondary 4, I joined the basketball team. It was hard for me because the training demanded a lot of strength and stamina. In the first month of the training, I was the last person to finish and often made mistakes when practicing certain tactics. However, failures did not knock me down. To meet the requirement, I started running and working out at the gym to gradually improve my fitness. I ploughed through all kinds of basketball tactics to make sure that I could deliver my best performance during training. Finally, the hard work did pay off and I learnt that being hardworking is always an irreplaceable factor when it comes to reaching goals.

At Secondary 5, I was chosen as the vice captain of Bancroft, my house. At the same time, my fellow committee members and I decided to run in the student union election. Under the new house policy, we needed to create a new cheerleading slogan and design a new house flag and house T-shirt. I learnt many new things such as using software to design the T-shirt and create a questionnaire to collect feedback. I made progress on my presentation skills as I had to report to my house teachers. It was a fruitful and meaningful experience.

Moreover, I was the public relations manager in my student union candidate cabinet named Devote. My job was to contact student unions in different schools and help organize joint-school activities. This job suited me well as I am an outgoing and talkative student. I like to communicate with others. Besides, I picked up some paperwork and communication skills after writing a joint-school contract agreement. I also learnt how to negotiate through bargaining with different stores for exclusive union membership discounts. Hence, my communication skills were enhanced. Although we lost in the election, I still enjoyed the process.

Through all this, I became more independent and mature. I acquired valuable skills which could surely help me adapt to university life and studies in the future.

◆注意:同學應按個人選科及發展意向撰寫SLP學生自述,文章只供參考,切勿抄襲◆

■中文版

我在整個高中生涯中參加了很多不同的課外活動,並從中獲得不少技能。

我中四時加入了學校籃球隊,球隊訓練對隊員的體能和耐力有極高要求,訓練過程蚢磥ㄘ騿C在首月訓練,我是全隊中最後一個達到訓練要求的隊員,更經常出現技巧失誤。然而,這些挫敗經驗並沒有擊潰我的信心,為了達到要求,我開始練跑和健身,逐漸改善體能;我亦不斷鑽研各種籃球技術,務求練習時發揮最佳表現。努力必得回報,我學懂了辛勤永遠是達標路上不可代替的因素。

除了加入籃球隊,中五那年我被老師選為副社長,與同社幹事一同經歷學生會選舉。根據社規,我們需為社設計新的啦啦隊口號、社旗及社服,過程掌握不少新知識,如學會用電腦軟件設計社服、以問卷方式收集社員意見等。我亦需向老師匯報社的事務,匯報技巧日見進步。擔任副社長的經驗別具意義,所學甚豐。

我個性外向,喜歡與別人溝通,故此也在學校擔任學生會競選內閣的公共關係幹事,主要負責聯絡外校學生會籌辦聯校活動,從中學會許多實用的文書與溝通技巧,如聯絡外校學生會時撰寫合約;競選時亦曾和其他內閣成員走訪多間店舖為學生謀取折扣與福利,學懂談判技巧,提升溝通能力。雖然我所屬的內閣最終落選,但我十分享受競選過程。

藉茈H上活動,我不但獲得珍貴的技能,更變得獨立和成熟。相信這些得益必能助我好好適應大學的校園與學習生活。

■點評

首段宜概括志向範疇 每段首句寫重點

撰文的同學完全沒有於學生自述提及個人發展方向,難以判斷他/她所選的個人經驗、特點是否與其心儀課程要求相關。建議同學首段便宏觀地寫出自己感興趣的學科範疇或職業。

行文上如前頁所提,每段第一句宜道出重點,以一個個人特點主導全段內容,再加例子闡述。撰文的同學寫法則剛好相反,以第二段為例,中心思想是他/她從籃球訓練中學懂辛勤的意義,前文卻花了很多筆墨描述自己克服困難的過程,要讀到末句方知重點,不夠直接。

此外,各段內容應該有明顯分野,避免重複。如第三、四段,雖然副社長和學生會競選內閣公關事務幹事崗位與職責不盡相同,但得茤M反思過於相近,都是說自己獲得文書處理、溝通等技巧。第四段還有另一問題,段落開首便敘述很多學生會的事務,到最後一句才表明其所屬內閣其實沒有當選。這樣的鋪排不太理想,容易引起誤會,以為同學真有籌辦學生會的經驗。

文字整理:許婉焮

圖:資料圖片

[明路—生涯規劃 第76期]

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